Will you remember me? — Life In The Middle

My very first post was about the phrase “_______ was here.” In it I described the phenomena of students writing their names followed by “was here” on my board and what that meant. This post is similar but more specific. I am going to introduce you to another one of my kids. For our purposes, we will call her Cass.

I will admit right off the bat that Cass is a hard one for me to read. At first glance, she appears confident, strong, well liked, and sure of herself. She is kind. She notices people…especially people that might otherwise be overlooked. She doesn’t come across as dramatic or overly sensitive, as some middle school kids do, but rather seems cool-headed and calm.

Early in the year Cass asked me a question that caught me a little off guard. “Do you remember all of your students?” My answer was simple. “Yes I do.” I do. Maybe it is because I have only been teaching for four years. I suppose it will get more difficult at some point. But for now, at least, I do. I remember my kids. How could I not? My answer did not satisfy Cass. “But do you remember ALL of your students? Even the shy, quiet ones. Like Amy or Jessica (made those names up).” She asked, looking in the direction of some especially quiet students in our class. “Will you remember them?” Her questioned were steeped with speculation. She clearly did not think I would remember. I answered again, “Yes. I will remember them. I remember my kids…even the quiet ones. I like them. They are interesting. I will remember them. I will remember you all.” She looked at me skeptically and walked away. This single encounter with Cass has not left my mind since it happened. It was so out of the blue and so different from any question a student had ever asked me. The more I thought about it, the more convinced I became that Cass wasn’t just asking me if I would remember those quieter kids but was asking if I would remember her. It wasn’t really “Will you remember them?” But rather, “Will you remember me?” And maybe even, “Please remember us.”

So many students, and people for that matter, feel overlooked. Forgotten. Unnoticed. They want to be seen…heard….remembered. Most of us feel this way at some point but would never come right out and say it. My kids, on the other hand, are less inhibited. They will ask. Will you remember? Do you notice me? Do you know me? They may not ask it that directly, but they ask. As teachers we have the difficult task of not only teaching our students but showing them we care. It isn’t always easy to do this, but it is absolutely worth it. I watch their faces and body language as they walk into my classroom each day and try to determine how they are doing. Are they happy? Stressed? Having a hard day? Can I help? How can I help? A compliment…a look of acknowledgement…a high five? I notice. And I do the best I can to show them I care, while simultaneously doing my best to teach them history.

Cass is starting to be a little easier for me to read. She cares about people. She is really funny. She is creative. She is dedicated. She goes out of her way to make people feel cared about and included. She is multifaceted. She is brilliant. She is strong. And I think she wants to know that she will be remembered. And I can assure you (and her) that she will. I will not ever forget her. I consider it an honor to know Cass. An honor to be her teacher and a part of her life, at least for this year.

In the movie Freedom Writers there is a quote from the Miep Gies character that sums this all up. After telling the kids that they are heroes she utters a few powerful words…”Your faces are engraved in my heart.” That is it. The truth. These “kids” of mine are engraved in my heart. Including Cass.